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Diary – Day 1

August 15, 2009

Saturday.  Who starts a diet on a Saturday?

Crazy people, that’s who.

The first official day of my 3 month commitment to veganism via the “Skinny Bitch” book method has arrived. It feels as though there should be some sort of ceremony, something to mark this day.  As I look at the weather forecast I notice that it’s already 90 degrees at 7am and humid as all get out.  Summer in Tennessee is the hottest, most miserable place in the world, aside from New Orleans.  Now that is the worst place for heat.  Maybe I should have a sort of voodoo ceremony to mark this day, minus the dead chickens of course – that wouldn’t be vegan.

About a year ago I sold my car.  I had thought I was moving within a few months and wanted to physically and mentally prepare for my move to the Netherlands where I will walk, bus, bike everywhere.  This seemed a good idea until my house didn’t sell as expected and now I bus or walk everywhere.  That slightly unhappy turn of events was made positive as I now enjoy a 2 mile walk to and from work most days.  I haven’t lost a lot of weight though – probably because I used to drink a tall latte and eat a brownie on the way to work nearly every day last fall thinking that the walk would offset those calories.  I have news for you – a 2 mile walk burns 100 calories.  That is one brownie crumb. 

So, it’s the bus to the grocery store this morning.  The hot, sweating, stinking bus. Every time someone coughed I tried to hold my breath until I was sure the germs had dispersed.  (30 seconds) The subsequent gasp for air probably negated my efforts as I likely sucked in the germs in a greater quantity.

The foods forbidden on this diet looked especially tantalizing today – chocolate bars screamed their cocoa content and added that they were Free Trade and who doesn’t want to support Free Trade.  It was practically criminal NOT to buy them.  Think of the children of underdeveloped countries…I imagined Sally Struthers’ face with an underdeveloped child.  I passed.

The cheese section though – it beckoned.  Calling to me in various accents, especially the French ones – WHORES!

I walked on and got out alive – and with a ton of food. From tiny fingerling potatoes, arugula and summer squashes to frozen selections like grilled eggplant and an edamame succotash blend titled “Soyccotash” that I just had to buy for the play on words alone.  These vegetables along with some fruit, soymilk, interesting rice blends and dried beans would last me a week.

Once home with my booty (and well aware of my other booty) I dug in to a breakfast of cherries and a sweet potato.  Yum, so full.

Or was I  – I then had a snack.  An apple.


Then another snack – puffed rice cereal, unsweetened soy milk, cherries and figs.

Before I ate my way out of house and home I figured I better do something with the day other than sit around and think of what my next vegan meal would be.  I decided to take in a movie.  A note to all dieters – a movie you should not see while on a strict diet regimen – Julie and Julia.  All that butter and food and talking about it and yumm.  I munched on snacks I brought from home – celery, figs, cherries and pepper slices and tried to imagine they were pomme frites or sole in butter sauce, or just a stick of butter maybe.

I had to leave the theatre about 1 hour into the movie.  It was too much.

Now I sit behind the computer with another snack – some puffed cereal and half a banana with soy milk and try to make sense of the day so far. If I were an addict I have confronted my fears, even taunted myself with my addiction through the grocery store and then the movie.  I don’t feel a profound sense of longing for the food though.  I don’t crave butter or sugar at this point, but I do feel this sense of loss and I am a little sad.

It’s only three months though – day one of my summer vacation from meat, dairy, sugar and white flour.  I will see them all again – I am already planning the party!

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