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Diary – Day 3 – the first day at work

August 17, 2009

There is something about being at work that can either cause me to eat crap all day long or, in the alternative, keep me away from making yummy things in the kitchen every hour on the hour. Today I managed to conform to the latter. El Yay!

The people at work who are clued in on the experiment have each been simultaneously encouraging while completely doubtful, as in “Good for you, I can’t believe you can give up [insert delicious food item here]!” or “Can I offer you some [something bacon or sugar laden] – oh wait, that’s riiight you’re a vegan, well bless your heart!”

To those not aware of this particular Southernism, “bless your heart” can mean anything from approximately, “that’s just about the most ridiculous thing I have ever heard in my life” to “Fuck You” – the phrase born out of religious zeal is the cover your ass for all those who are too polite to even say ass. I know what they mean though and, being a naturally suspicious creature, I usually figure they mean Fuck You.

After all, in the land of Tennessee Country Ham served on a biscuit and every vegetable cooked within an inch of its life with bacon – to abstain from meat is blasphemous, perhaps even un-American. I would tend to agree. I have always found vegetables tasted better with just a touch, at least, of bacon. That glorious creature, the pig, was given to us by God, was it not?

My lentils and rice with assorted vegetables was not exactly appetizing to those at lunch. I have to admit, lentils are rather pathetic looking. Tiny round pellets of brown – like little bugs. Bugs aren’t allowed on the Vegan Regimen though. I shifted them to mix with the colorful medley of zucchini, red peppers and soyccotash – embarrassed for my ugly food. My figs and cherries were greeted in a much more enthusiastic manner. Who doesn’t love fruit? Co-workers would rather have said fruit baked in a pie or served with whipped cream – but common ground is that fruit is delectable and vegetables are a side dish – pure and simple.

These will be some tough converts. I am aiming for tolerance at least.

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2 Comments leave one →
  1. Anthony permalink
    August 19, 2009 11:44 pm

    I love this blog. I just sipped my coffee reading every word you have written so far. I will follow you on this journey. You have a lot more gusto than I do to go 100% vegan. Everyone I know who has done this for health/weight issues never went back. They actually made this their new eating habit and enjoyed their lives. I’m on the ‘skinny bitch’ diet with you, but I am cutting myself a lot more slack and still getting away with pounds melting away. But hey, let’s be honest, I’m also a boy, and boys can get away with murder, can’t we, 666?

    • kristenvolt permalink*
      August 20, 2009 8:20 am

      666 – the mark of the beast…satan, didn’t you see The Omen? Really.

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