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The Food Whisperer

September 9, 2009

Today I recommitted to veganism after the slip ups of the weekend.  I feel as though I am coming back to a religion I don’t quite understand or believe in – something that I find myself sampling for kicks.

I suppose that’s exactly what I am doing.  I have no real reason to be a vegan other than the weight loss benefits and the health benefits when, and if, they ever come.  This is something to do simply to see if I can do it.  I think that’s why I feel so miserable for the three slip ups (1- cupcake licking, 2 – fro-yo, 3 – beignet and cafe au lait).  It’s only been three weeks and I have had an average of one slip up a week.

Maybe that’s normal.  There’s a very popular way of dieting here in the US where you are “good” all week long and have one “cheat” day.  People talk about their cheat day incessantly – it’s on par with the term “date night” for most annoying catch phrase of the 30 something crowd.  Not a bad idea though – if you’re good all week you get a treat.  My Pavlovian response would be to eat a Pavlova. 

Perhaps I can bend the food preoccupation to my will, slowly coaxing it into a more agreeable and healthier version of itself.

I will become The Food Whisperer and all starch will kneel before me, sugar dissolve and melt away, dairy liquify and evaporate.  In their stead, an army of vegetables who pledge me their fealty.  Heavy is the head who wears the crown.  It’s not easy being the Queen of Green.

2 Comments leave one →
  1. The Zen Mumbler permalink
    September 10, 2009 1:41 am

    Instead of a gold one, may I suggest a crown of thorns?
    It’s green, light and used to its owner lamenting her plight.

    • kristenvolt permalink*
      September 10, 2009 5:21 am

      I’ve decided to wear my thorn of crowns
      inside out
      upside down
      all the way ’round

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